Billy and Chrissy Quick, Halloween circa 1981.
When I was three years old my mom dressed me up as Super Apple for Halloween. While other kids begged for candy as Ewoks or princesses, there was little Chrissy with her sandwich-board apple, cape, mask, and blonde pigtails. Perhaps this is when I started to fancy myself a superhero.
Author’s Note: Thanks to Jeff Larche for the advice that inspired this post.
Super Chris
My ordinary self is nerdy, insecure and unimpressive. These traits are not a good match for my big ambitions. A couple years ago, I started getting serious about my dreams. I wanted to start my own freelance business, be a writer, start a blog. I wanted to help people as a consultant and trainer. But if I was going to actually DO all this, I couldn’t be meek and scared all the time. I needed to call on the very best parts of me, my superhero self. Thus Chris Quick was born.
Actually, I was born Chris Quick. (Christina Elin Quick is my given name.) I gave up the Quick for a time when I got married, but when I was planning my professional “brand” I decided to resurrect my trusty old name. It’s short and has that nice comic book alliteration - like Lois Lane, Peter Parker, or Clark Kent.
The superhero theme also works for me because I view myself as being two people. The quiet bookworm Christina Henderson transforms herself into Chris Quick, super-heroine marketer/writer/teacher changing the world for good. I don’t have a lot of natural confidence, so I have to call on my acting skills. I play the role of someone more dynamic and braver than me. I have to act like the person I wish I was.
My professional head shots even show the difference between my “real” self and my actress/Chris Quick self. The photo (courtesy of John LaPorte) I have on this blog, Twitter and Facebook is Chris Quick. When my husband Eric saw that picture in the proofs he said, “Who’s THAT girl?!” I look so happy, confident, and up to something. It’s Chris Quick, fresh out of the phone booth.
I was hesitant to use that picture at first, assuming it was a bit too sassy and youthful to be taken seriously. But then I thought people might friend me just because of that picture. “Who’s THAT girl?” I could lure them in and then show them the thoughtful, studious person behind the smile.
This photo is more the real me. Serious, pensive, and slightly awkward. Not at all photogenic. My HS Senior picture looks very much the same.
Sasha Fierce and the Flat World
Beyonce thinks she’s two people, too. The pop star released a new album, “I Am … Sasha Fierce,” on November 18 and was the subject of widespread ridicule when she released a statement and appeared on talk shows explaining her alter ego, Sasha.
“I have someone else that takes over when it’s time for me to work and when I’m on stage,” she said. “This alter ego that I’ve created that kind of protects me and who I really am. Sasha Fierce is the fun, more sensual, more aggressive, more outspoken side and more glamorous side that comes out when I’m working and when I’m on the stage.”
People think she’s crazy, but I get it. I do the same thing. And it’s really nothing new. Sometimes the character we play is only in our heads (like Sasha Fierce, before November). But all kinds of people, famous and not-so-famous, rebrand themselves publicly for various reasons, with a professional name, a stage name, or a nom de plume.
This creation of a distinct public self was once solely the domain of the entertainment industry, but not any more. We’re living in a new Web 2.0 era of globalization in which it doesn’t seem to be enough to just show up and do our jobs. Ordinary people create “personal brands” because the tools are there, and because it seems necessary.
Competition for knowledge-worker jobs is greater than ever. In this global economy we aren’t just competing against our fellow Americans, we’re competing against a new generation of highly educated people in developing countries. People who will do the same job for significantly less money. (Read The World is Flat by Thomas Friedman)
We can’t define ourselves by the companies we work for any more. People switch jobs too often, and companies disappear with alarming frequency. All of us workers, displaced or not, need to carve out our own reputation. We have to seek visibility and a distinct professional identity in order to stay in the game.
Woody Allen built a brand on neurotic insecurity. Most of the rest of us need to brand ourselves on confidence. So what to do if you’re not one of those people who was born confident? You ACT confident.
Act like a host, not a guest.
This was the theme of a talk I gave when I was Education Coordinator for my local BNI chapter. The lesson was born of personal experience. I was in charge of planning a nice photo-op event with local dignitaries for a client’s 100th anniversary celebration. But when the US Congressman, the state representative, the mayor and the cameraperson showed up, I just stood there in uncomfortable silence. I hung back on the sidelines like a bewildered visitor, even though I’d planned the entire event. I wasted the opportunity to meet some very nice people - important nice people with the power to lower my taxes.
When you’re networking and making a name for yourself you’ve got to take initiative. You’re not allowed to be a wallflower, even if all the personality tests say you’re an introvert. It doesn’t matter what your official role is. If you want to be successful you’ve got to act like a host, not a guest.
Guests wait for someone to take their coats, offer them a drink, and introduce them around the room. They stand in a corner until someone rescues them. They are self-conscious. They have nothing to DO.
To give yourself courage, act like a host. Tap into the resources of hospitality you use when you welcome new people into your home. Don’t wait to be properly introduced. Don’t wait for others to come to you. Approach someone. Shake their hand. Ask their name. Ask open-ended questions. Pay them a compliment. Search for things you have in common. Make sure you know where the food, drinks and restrooms are and help other guests find them. Introduce your new friends to other people in the room. Assign yourself the role of host, and no one will ever suspect you were scared. It worked for Paula.
A week after I gave this talk one of our members, Paula, showed up with exciting news. She and her husband own a small engine retail shop. At a regional meeting hosted by one of their biggest suppliers, Paula was selected for a leadership role in her dealer’s network. She told me, “I thought about what you said. I decided to act like a host. And when the rep asked who wanted the job, I raised my hand. I normally wouldn’t do that.”
A few months later Paula had to leave our networking group. She was promoted to a paid position with that same supplier and had to travel a lot, paying visits to other dealers in the region and helping them succeed.
The Era of the New Superhero
These are hard times. Kids see their dads cry for the first time. People show up to work with brown bag lunches and leave before noon with a cardboard box. The guy we’ve seen on TV or in the newspaper every week for decades is suddenly unplugged. When the going gets tough, the scared do nothing. Superheroes kick into action.
It’s time for a new era of superheroism. One where ordinary people forget about the bat signal and dig in the basement for their Underoos and cape. That’s right, folks. It’s time for Super Apple - the decidedly ordinary person who uses their guts and smarts to do extraordinary things. We all gotta save the day.
In my case, becoming a superhero meant resurrecting the person my mom always thought I could be. If you aren’t blessed with someone who believes in your superpowers, you might have to find the resolve to believe in yourself. But whatever you do, do something. Take the next actionable step. (Read Getting Things Done by David Allen)
Feeling overwhelmed? Watch the hilarious movie, What About Bob? and then follow in Bill Murray’s babysteps.
Scared to make that phone call?
Babysteps write down what you want to say. Babysteps pick up the phone. Babysteps ask for the head honcho. Babysteps start talking.
Afraid to start your web-based business or blog?
Find a graphic designer. Order a logo. Slap it on your stuff.
Find a good photographer. Show him headshots you like. Get your picture taken. Upload to the web.
Sign up for Twitter. Follow your heroes. Tweet your thoughts. Make some friends. Build up some courage.
Buy a domain name. Ask your web designer friend to set up your site. Receive his gift. Post your stuff.
Sign up for WordPress. Write your first blog post. Tell folks on Twitter you’ve hung out your blogging shingle.
Afraid to give presentations or talk in front of people?
Go to a Toastmasters meeting. Stand up and talk. Volunteer to give a speech. Get better.
Does networking make you stammer and sweat?
Join BNI or the Chamber of Commerce. Go to a meeting or event. Act like a host. Raise your hand.
Not sure whether to go back to school?
Download the application. Fill it out. Send it in. Pick up the phone. Ask for the letters of recommendation. Send them in too. Wait for yes.
Weave your own safety net
Get busy doing stuff. Then when your boss tells you he has to cut your hours and you may lose your job, you don’t have so far to fall. Your super self is there to catch you.
